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What about Worst Comments?
Crocodael Date: Monday, 19.10.2009, 19:38 | Message # 1





Hey hey, everybody!
Due to popular demand, the worst comments thread is back!

I can't remember who started it originally, but it got killed during December last year, and it doesn't look as if anybody else is going to restart it soon, so I thought I'll have a stab at it.

For those who can't remember the original thread, the idea is to post all the really silly and stupid stuff regarding CG you've heard.

Example: We were doing a job last year. The clients came in and changed some stuff, and asked how long we needed to make the changes. Upon hearing our answer (one day to do and two to render, I think) they went: "But it's already rendered! Can't you just tweak the render?"

My dad was once given a pic taken of the rear of a car, and got asked if he could flip the pic around so the clients could see the front.

And my favourate: clients asking us to make changes, we don't change a single thing, they come back and go: "That's a hundred times better!"

Come on! Help rebuild the funniest thread of al time!

 
Lumbert Date: Monday, 19.10.2009, 19:39 | Message # 2





When working on a PC game, the lead programmer told the producer we couldn't include all the video the producer wanted in the game because there wasn't enough room on the CD. The producer asked the programmer if he could just install the video to the player's hard drive instead.
The programmer said... "so you want to add a second CD?"
The producer said "No, the game will only be one CD, just install the video to the hardrive."
The prgrammer then said "So what should I do? Just put the loose video files in the box? They won't fit on a single CD."
 
Guest Date: Monday, 19.10.2009, 19:39 | Message # 3





Ok my uncle needs a graphic made. Its 1x1200 and has a gradient from white to grey on it. It takes me less then 10 seconds to make it and email it to him. (he hasnt the 1st clue about graphics)

My friend comes in and says "who was that"
I said "My uncle just needed a graphic made"
My friend says "What was it?"
I said "just a gradient for the background of his website"
And my friend said "Dude, imagine how much money you could make doing that"
I just stared at him blankly for atleast 10 seconds.......

 
Guest Date: Monday, 19.10.2009, 19:39 | Message # 4





About 4 years ago, I did my student work experience placement at an architects, producing 3D models and walkthroughs of proposed building designs.

There was one particularly hot headed company director, and my very first introduction to him went something like this: (the guy had no experience of 3D whatsoever)

Him: "Hi Dave, you've been working on this thing for 4 days now, can I have a look at what you've done?"

Me: "Sure" (Very pleased with myself, have worked late and busted a gut to produce as much as possible. I start by showing him the wireframe plan view in the enlarged 'top' viewport)

Him: "IS THAT ALL YOU'VE DONE?! FOUR F**KING DAYS AND ALL YOU DONE IS DRAW A PLAN??"

Me: " ... No ... look ... its a 3d model ... you can rotate it around ... look, heres a rendering I did 5 minutes ago ..."

Him: (Walks off in a huff and doesn't speak to me for a week)

I also very nearly had to slap one of my non-CG orientated friends recently for the following comment:

Friend: "Y'know, putting lens flares on photographs really just adds the finishing touch ... lens flares just look so ... professional."

 
Guest Date: Monday, 19.10.2009, 19:40 | Message # 5





Another story from the architect place I worked at when I was a student:

When I had my initial interview there, I took my folio of work produced using 3DS MAX. I told them that I was still learning the software, and that it was the only 3D programme I knew at the time.

Interviewer: "Fine, fine ... thats no problem" (practically drooling, as I'm a student and so will only be earning £140 a week in this job, whilst he can sell my stuff to the client for full price)

So I start work there, and quickly realise I'm expected to produce MAX and Lightscape quality renders using a copy of Microstation '95 on a Power mac with 32 mb of RAM (they neglected to point this out in the interview, probably because they were all computer illiterate)

Furthermore, I realised that the previous employee had been producing all of his renders using what I suspected to be an illegal copy of 'Strata' (which he had removed from the system at the time of his departure - only small portions of the programme files remained)

So, I go to the hot-headed company director to try and explain the situation:

Me: "Hey look ... this might be pirated software ... you could get in a lot of trouble for this"

Him: "I'M SICK AND TIRED OF EXCUSES! YOU TOLD ME YOU COULD DO THIS JOB! I BET THAT WASN'T EVEN YOUR WORK IN YOUR FOLIO!!!!"

 
Anderson Date: Monday, 19.10.2009, 19:41 | Message # 6





bear in mind producers and art directors have to justify themselves being there and getting a grossely overinflated salary compared to us, the graphics peeps. so that means there's always going to be the situation of, you see the producer coming accross the room (i've omitted their words, and left that side of the conversations)...oh you're going to come over here to make some inane comment for the sake ofit... oh no please don't... oh i can see it coming... oh... you did... "yes grey, green and purple are horrible colors, they're the companies color scheme that you told me i mustn't deviate from"... (producer scuttles away, bringing back ominous sheet) ..."No, when it prints it will be fine... no that's because it's on screen... yes the same size as on your sheet... yes the color will be correct... no i realise it doesn't look the same on screen, that's because these monitors aren't calibrated correctly but the printer will get the pantone color reference both from me and on the file..." realise i've gone too technical on them ... "ok sure i'll change it on screen for you, no problems"... thinking you moron.

Actually that hards to the main question i used to get and hear my workmates getting "Hi, I just printed that jpeg you sent me to show me what the layout looks like, and the colors are way off the companies color reference. Didn't I send you that earlier? Here let me go and get that for you" (and this is firstly a highly compressed jpeg, that they've secondly printed out on a badly callibrated color laser printer, which in the end is meant to be projected onto some worn out screen using some ancient barco...needless to say, after having explained this to them so many hundereds of times already i expect that explaining this again wouldnt do any good so i agree to make the changes, then do nothing more than maybe play a little with the color calibration on my monitor for next time they come back)

 
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